“Hi, my name’s John and I don’t sleep.”

[As a warm, welcoming support group] “Hi, John.”

“I’ve been intentionally incurring 4 hours of sleep debt every night since early 2003.”

[Applause]

“I’m planning to make it up by sleeping through all of 2007, The Year of The Pig. I haven’t discussed this with my wife yet.”

[Random coughing]