Actual conversation between my wife and my 4-year-old daughter today:

Daughter (sweetly): Mommy, I want a cookie.
Wife: We don't have any cookies.
Daughter (indignant panic): WHAT!?
Wife: We don't have any cookies.
Daughter: Well, I want a cookie so I'm going someplace with cookies. I'm leaving!
Wife: Ok.
Daughter: I won't be back until Saturday.

I really didn’t think I’d have to deal with this level of drama until she was at least 12 or 13. Anyway, tomorrow, we’re making cookies.