Me: I think Jack Black stole my schtick.
Lovely and Talented Wife: Jack Black stole your “schtick?”
Me: We have similar mannerisms when we speak. I mean, he’s never met me, or seen me, or heard me talk, that I know of. But, yah.
LATW: And he’s older than you.
Me: Well, I certainly didn’t steal his schtick. It’s like we have similar minds.
LATW: That’s a scary thought.
LATW: Hmm… You’re almost the same shape, too.

I can’t win.