My son came along while the lovely and talented wife and I were sitting at the breakfast table. The children had finished breakfast and were playing. He walked up to the table and announced that the toy he was holding was actually a brain sucker and that he’d like to suck out our brains. “Ok,” we agreed. He sucked out my wife’s brains first. “Now I’m going to put them in your head, Dad.” Then he sucked out my brains and put them in her head. I said, “I suddenly feel like I need new shoes!” She retorted, “I’m an idiot!”

I’m so far behind I don’t even keep score anymore.